Early in my career, I was handed an important lesson by my first boss back in 1992.
He told me that all persons have latent(potential) and obvious qualities. Additionally these qualities can be judged by self or others.This creates a quadrant.I will list all the squares below as it is the best way to describe them.
1st square: Self=Obvious, Others=latent. These are your secret abilities/qualities.
2nd square Self=latent,Others= obvious. This is what the world thinks about your qualities/yourself, but you may have no inkling.
3rd square Self=Obvious, Others= obvious. These are your proven abilities recognised by all.
4th square Self=latent,others=latent. This is your unknown potential.
There can be an issue of self image when there is contradiction between 1st and 2nd square.You may believe yourself to be a very straight,honest and god-fearing humble person.Others may see you as a crooked, conniving,lazy person.Truth is usually midway between self image and reputation.
Not many people face up very well to square 2 if there is a negative connotation as it is seen as criticism and denial is complete. I actually have practiced hard to get a cool headed analysis of such things directed at me. An useful ploy is to look at it from the others point of view. Sometimes it is genuine, sometimes it is because of insecurity and fear, or plain malice or jealousy.
Sometimes we create a halo around our own heads, in reality the head is in the clouds.
It is necessary to do a self assessment periodically and see if self image and reputation are well reconciled with each other.
I was discussing with a colleague on how our jobs have been impacted with the advent of the “e” age and 24×7 business.
Burn-outs,nervous breakdowns or worse a coronary are emerging as real threats. Some people lose focus of their objectives in life.They find solace in the concept of keeping themselves busy with inane urgent but unproductive activities.This creates more pressure with unfinished tasks piling up.
A senior pro consistently got top achievements till one fine day he found himself relegated to the bottom and he had very few ideas to change the situation.He had not managed the paradigm shift well when his responsibilities were expanded. He shifted blame on failure to personal reasons and biased management.
His self image of a selfless and “a people’s person” was at variance with the general perception.His confidence is in tatters.He is unable to prioritize, as reasoning is affected due to these various pressures impacting him.His despair and anguish is clearly visible.
If only he negotiates the next few steps well, and gets some wind back!!Not only does he really posses a fantastic PR, he is also very capable of finding back his midas touch.
All this is subject to his getting his thought process organised.
Another gent was hugely dis-satisfied with a sales job, so he undertook a self development plan which allowed him to leapfrog natural progression and assume a higher function.He managed the paradigm shift well.But he lost his will to work.All energies are now devoted to the pursuit of retirement at the earliest.I was taken aback when my opinion was sought on a complex algorithm developed to crack the case of wuinning a 3 million USD bounty in a lottery.A colossal waste of intellectual capability,were my private thoughts.So is the paradigm shift really mastered by this gent? His other favorite discussion topic is “immortality “.
Meet you in a couple of centuries from now?
I myself lead a dysfunctional life with my dear ones countries apart. What would others be thinking of me. “This guy is a desperate person, with no emotional attachments, only money drives him”.
Who am I to judge others?
